"Good, better, best" is a phrase that describes varying levels of quality or achievement. But really, it is the most accessible way to understand that effort varies every day, and in every situation, and that is perfectly okay. So often, we move towards making change by committing to or refraining from doing something. Whatever the desired change, when efforts fall short, and they always do, it can be discouraging and result in getting off track or even giving up. Every day is different and unique, presenting new opportunities, challenges, and experiences. Even though some routines and patterns may exist in our lives, unexpected
Good, Better, Best allows us to respect where we are in our day, week, or life and still move forward.
events and circumstances can make each day distinct. Factors such as physical wellness, personal interactions, work or school responsibilities, and external influences can contribute to the ever-changing nature of our days. Good, Better, Best allows us to respect where we are in our day, week, or life and still move forward. It permits us to put in the effort we have available on any given day without shame.
These words were introduced to me through Master Chunyi Lin, creator of Spring Forest Qigong, https://www.springforestqigong.com. While this concept has always been part of "therapy-speak," such as telling clients to "focus on the process," "no need to be perfect," or "any step forward is progress," these specific words seem to be the most accessible way to embrace this concept. Good Better Best! Historically I have talked with clients about avoiding perfectionism, trying as an essential part of growth and achievement, and incremental change as a necessary part of progress. But now I say, "Good, Better Best." Getting started can be difficult, so anything you do toward your goal, visualizing, taking any action, or even making a plan is good. More than that is better, and so much happens between good and best; everything counts. So, let's explore the concepts of trying, perfectionism, and making progress.
The phrase "There is no try, only do" is a concept popularized by the Star Wars character Yoda in the movie "The Empire Strikes Back." This paradoxical message carries a valuable lesson. In the Star Wars universe context, Yoda uses this phrase to emphasize the importance of commitment and taking action. From a broader perspective, this concept can be interpreted as encouraging a mindset shift from a passive, tentative approach to an active, determined one. It highlights the idea that actual progress and achievement come from engaging in actions and committing to them rather than being consumed by doubt or fear of failure. At face value, many people could stop right there and not pursue something due to the need to take an "active, determined approach." But Good Better Best can create a new pathway to get you there. It allows you to overcome self-imposed limitations by recognizing every effort counts. Every effort is forward toward the goal, and every step, no matter how big or small, is an active approach.
So replace trying with the word efforts and you have a way to recognize every step as moving towards achievement, learning, and success. Here are a few reasons why recognizing every effort is important:
1. Opportunity for Growth: Varying efforts allow you to expand your skills, knowledge, and abilities. It presents an opportunity to learn from experiences, whether you succeed or encounter challenges. Through acknowledging varying efforts you can discover new strengths, improve existing skills, and develop resilience in the face of setbacks.
2. Overcoming Fear and Doubt: Every effort counting helps you overcome fear and self-doubt. By taking action and stepping outside your comfort zone, you challenge yourself to confront uncertainties and expand your limits. Each time you make an effort, you build confidence and strengthen your belief in your capabilities.
3. Discovering New Possibilities: Efforts open doors to new opportunities and possibilities. They help you explore different paths, ideas, and perspectives you may have missed. By stepping into new things, you may uncover hidden talents, passions, or interests that can shape your future endeavors.
4. Achieving Goals and Dreams: Efforts are fundamental steps toward achieving your goals and turning your dreams into reality. Without action, goals remain mere aspirations. Every effort is a concrete step toward your objectives, increasing the likelihood of success and fulfillment.
5. Building Resilience: Your efforts allow you to develop resilience, which is crucial in navigating life's challenges. When you encounter obstacles or face failures, trying again and persisting demonstrates your ability to bounce back, learn from mistakes, and keep moving forward.
6. Embracing Personal Development: Every effort fosters personal development and self-improvement. It pushes you to learn, adapt, and evolve continuously. Through each effort, you can enhance your skills, broaden your knowledge, and become a better version of yourself.
7. Seizing Opportunities: Each and every effort enables you to seize opportunities that come your way. By taking action, you position yourself to capitalize on chances for growth, success, or meaningful experiences. It allows you to make the most of the resources and possibilities available.
Remember, your efforts don't always guarantee immediate success but provide valuable lessons, growth, and progress. It is through your efforts that you discover your true potential, expand your horizons, and create a life that is fulfilling and meaningful to you.
Perfectionism refers to pursuing an idealized, flawless state that is ultimately unattainable and is a barrier to many people seeking goals. Perfection is an abstract concept that varies from person to person and is subjective. Due to the complexities and imperfections inherent in human nature and the world around us, achieving absolute perfection is unrealistic. It is essential to recognize that striving for excellence and setting high standards can be positive and motivating for some. However, it is problematic for most because it sets unattainable and rigid ideals and leads to negative consequences. Perfectionism comes at a cost emotionally, mentally, and physically.
1. Emotionally: Perfectionism can lead to heightened anxiety, stress, and self-criticism. The constant pursuit of flawlessness and the fear of making mistakes can create a sense of never feeling good enough, leading to frustration, disappointment, and low self-esteem.
2. Mentally: Perfectionism often involves setting unrealistically high standards for oneself. This can lead to overwhelming pressure to meet those standards, which can be mentally exhausting. Perfectionists may engage in negative self-talk, excessively ruminate over perceived failures or mistakes, and constantly worry about their performance, which can negatively impact their mental well-being.
3. Physically: The chronic stress and anxiety associated with perfectionism can affect physical health. High-stress levels can lead to a weakened immune system, disrupted sleep patterns, headaches, muscle tension, and even more severe health issues such as cardiovascular problems. Additionally, perfectionism may contribute to unhealthy behaviors such as overworking, neglecting self-care, or developing eating disorders.
Lastly, progressing towards a goal means moving forward and taking steps that bring you closer to achieving that goal. It involves actively working on tasks, actions, or behaviors that align with your desired outcome. Good Better Best helps optimize all your efforts and acknowledges all levels of achievement are equally important. Embracing a growth mindset, learning from mistakes, and focusing on progress rather than perfection can lead to greater personal well-being and a more balanced approach to life's challenges.
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